Anchored. is MFLN Family Development’s [https://blogs.extension.org/militaryfamilies/family-development/] NEW podcast created to support and inspire those connected to military families. Each episode focuses on real life struggles and topic areas that many families encounter. We invite you to sit back, relax and get Anchored. with us!
How to obtain CEUs:
We provide National Association of Social Workers (NASW) and Georgia Marriage and Family Therapy CE credits. We anticipate being able to offer 1.0 CEUs for this episode. A link to the URL to obtain CEUs will be provided on this webpage when CEU's are available.
Reg McCutcheon is a retired Lt Col from the US Air Force, a combat veteran and Bronze Star recipient. Reg has served in many capacities in his career to include squadron commander, chief of operations training, NATO senior planner, combat crew commander and regional director of admissions at the USAF Academy. Reg is currently a student in the Valdosta State University Marriage and Family Therapy program.
The military hasn’t always been the ideal place for marriage. There is the old saying, “if we had wanted you to have a wife, we would’ve issued you one”.
It was always a trade-off. I’ve got to go, you have to handle this here…. Gone for 3 or 4 weeks at a time. Ultimately, mission came first because it’s about national defense, the defense of our country and the things we hold very high in our country.
Ultimately, when they say goodbye to their spouse to go to that theater, that’s not the person that comes back. Things change. It’s a bell that can’t be un-rung in a family because after the exposure, after the experiences, it’s hectic, it’s chaotic, it’s dangerous and you live in that daily.
Those men and women are not ever going to be the same. They have an exposure that they have never seen before. It’s one thing to talk about an experience until you’ve lived in it. When you’ve lived in it, your whole world changes.
The unknown of what is going on in the world… 9/11 changed us dramatically. It just changed the whole shape and dynamic of war and how vulnerable we are. It truly changed our dynamic a bit.
It’s being able to catch yourself. You lose perspective of the moment you’re in, the people you’re with, and the risk you are putting them in.
For therapists, the thought I have is that you can’t be there soon enough and you won’t be able to stay long enough. It’s just the way it is. But you can make enough difference that it might be just enough. Because it just takes some thought, some existential moment, some phrase, some way that’s going to flip the switch and change it.
We can teach mindfulness in some way… We can teach them that the path home is different from the path going out. But, it’s a long process.